I went to work the following Monday morning completely energized and excited.  I had our usual PLC (professional learning community) meeting.  My department met together and we talked about the activities I had participated in.  I was still struggling with an idea for a lesson plan idea.  My department chair gave me some great ideas and I ran with it.  I created a lesson to teach my beginning level drawing students how to draw the proportions of a still life accurately by using fractions.  Then we turned our fractions into a musical composition.  It turned out extremely odd, but the drawings I received from my students were some of the strongest I have seen in a while.  I usually have those few students who still struggle with drawing what they see in front of them.  This year during the still life assignment, I saw none.  This only brought more excitement.  I couldn't wait for the next class to begin. 

During this time, I began to notice how little time I had for my book.  I wasn't drawing or creating anything for myself.  I know this sounds a little selfish, but in order for me to feel sane I need to create just for the sake of creating.  Its my destressor.  It is how I stay "rooted" to the my own world and the world around me.  It was making me sad thinking I would have to postpone working on my book until my master's program was completed. 

Here is the start of my journal for my master's program.  Today I'm just sharing what I actually wrote down in my attempt to keep a journal.

Just a bit of information: my master's degree is a Master's in Education: Integrate Teaching Through the Arts.

August 15th and 16th 2009
First weekend of my master's program.  Sandi, our instructor, knew my name immediately.  Apparently I was the first and only to complete all 6 module of the search path assignment.  It was requested that we complete all pre-assignments before we met for class.  She told the entire class that I'm the one to keep an eye on.  I'm the "techie."  I blushed and thought, "Oh, great.  I'm already in the spotlight."  Sometimes I hate being good at stuff.  The search path thing was easy.  I felt like it was made for people who have never researched anything.  It didn't teach me anything I didn't already know.  In truth, I felt it was a waste of my time.  But I completed it anyways. 

The first day was very laid back and relaxed.  We took care of business helping people finish their registration, turning in paperwork, and getting our login info for the laptops.  I sat in between Martha and Colleen.  Everyone seems so nice.  We did an activity where Sandi played music and read us a story about the sun's path starting its day.  Then we were given a paper and told to fill it with color.  When we were done we had to find our matching partner.  It was amazing to see how our matching parts were like they were made for each other.  My partner was Kimberly, who earlier in the bathroom had told me she was going through a divorce like me.  Apparently a lot of the women there have had some experience.  I'm the only one really open to discuss it.  But it felt great knowing I wasn't alone in that scenario.  During the activity, we were supposed to learn about each other, which we did... kind of.  We talked about our divorces.  We made up something during our time to share.  Then we had to think about how we could use this in our classrooms.  I'm finding myself hating this question.  I mean, everyone in class teaches english, math, or elementary school.  So for them its easy to figure out how to change the lesson.  I could easily do the activities as they are to incorporate reading and writing.  But that's not the point fo the program.  I'm suppose to figure out how to tailor it to my classroom.  So here is the million dollar question: "How do I use art to teach art?"  Its the question that bothers me and I struggle to find the answer.  So when Sandi asks the dreaded "How would you use this in your classroom?" I sit silently trying to think but really I can't see the activity in any other way than what it already is.  She always looks at me and smiles with hopeful eyes that I might share some brilliant idea.  Pressure.  Its the spot light pressure of being labeled the "techie." 

And on day 2, my artwork really stood out.  Everyone did these lines and squiggles or images and me, I pull off a powerful piece.  Everyone ooohed and ahhed over it.  It even brought out the most powerful word descriptions than any other.  I now fear that my artistic manner is not going to be my magic wand.  I think it might end up being a crutch that just gets in the way.

I do have to say I don't like performing.  I hate acting.  I REALLY don't like singing in front of people.  But the activities have all been some type of performance and they have all been a lot of fun.  I've truly enjoyed myself.  I'm beginning to let go of that fear of humiliation.  I almost never thought I'd get that back.  I used to be fearless.  I never cared about what others would think when they saw me.  I think this is something I lost when I met him.  I think in my mind I associated being an adult with acting a proper way, but I censored myself too much.  And now its difficult for me to fully let go and just perform.  I think the guitar lessons, kickboxing and now this master's program will help me let go.  It already has in a way.

I kept my word on one thing so far.  I finished editing the video and have posted it to the website.  Thank you to everyone who help out Warren High reach an incredible amount of money for such a great cause.  These Mizzles were created and now have wonderful homes. 

I've taken a few weeks off from working on the book.  I think its time I get back to it.  I'm recharged and ready to move forward.

I'm sorry to everyone for my lack of commitment to this blog.  I have no real excuse for not staying up to date on this website.  I went back to school to work on my masters degree.  Its has been an incredible adventure so far.  I'm still creating Mizzles and I'm still working on my book.  The bright side to everything is that my master's program has pushed me pay more attention to the Mizzles.  I feel more motivated than I ever have been to finish my book.  I'm looking forward to spring break so I can spend whole days working on it. 

For my master's program, I am supposed to be keeping a journal or a log of my journey.  I'm just as bad at that as I am with this blog.  Then the brilliant idea struck me.  I can use this blog as my journal.  I will have to back track a little to tell you the story from the beginning, but I think this will work perfectly.... hopefully.

I'll start by sharing my adventure of March Madness:

I feel really bad that I've neglected this website for so long.  But to keep everyone in the loop, I've been working on my children's book.  Its coming along nicely.  I have also created quite a few new characters that have been adopted.  I will be posting them up soon.  Also, keep an eye out for the Mizzles' music video.  They are in studio working on it now.